Tips to Manage Worries

Our mind is always thinking. After all, this is our mind’s job, to think. This of course, includes worrying, something that everybody does. People often worry about different things and it can be even healthy to worry a little about certain things, as this can help us get things done or solve problems. However, some people worry more than others and find it difficult to control or stop worrying. This difficulty to control worries can lead to anxiety disorders and can be quite impairing for some individuals. This can be detrimental to the person’s mood, ability to concentrate and perform, and even impact family and social relationships.

Here are a few of the tips I often recommend. Some of them I have practice them myself in moments of high stress and they help me relax or manage my worries.

But, first things first. Our body and brain need to be taken care of in order for them to function properly. Poor sleep, unhealthy eating habits, lack of physical activity and lack of leisure time can cause physical and mental health conditions or an inability to manage stressors and/or worries. So, I will start with the basics:

The Basics

1. Sleep- worries can impair your sleep and poor sleep can impair your cognitive abilities, making it harder to manage control your worries. It is important to sleep enough and maintain a regular bedtime routine, as well as a good sleep hygiene. A well-rested brain and body function much better than a tired one and are definitely much more effective and efficient. Follow the recommendations below to help you improve your sleep and manage worries at bedtime. The National Sleep Foundation also provides very helpful strategies to improve your sleep hygiene, as they are also essential for a good sleep.

• Healthy eating habits- have you ever heard “you are what you eat”? Well, that applies here too. Your brain is affected by everything we intake. And yes, this includes food, especially junk food. Make sure to make healthy choices and eat small portions several times a day instead of one or two big meals. You may also want to limit your caffeine and alcohol intake, as they only worsen your ability to manage worries and lead to anxiety.

• Physical activity- we all know that physical activity has many benefits for our health, and this includes mental health. Exercise produce endorphins that gives us a sense of relaxation. Research has also proven that it can help by improving our sleep, concentration, alertness and enhance cognitive functions. Try at least going for a walk 3-4 times a week for about 20-30 minutes and this may make a difference in your overall health.

• Leisure time- separate time to relax. Your body and your brain need this time to disconnect from your worries. Spend time with family, friends or just by yourself and allow your mind and body some time to relax and rest.

Mindfulness and Relaxation

1. Practice mindfulness- Try seeing your worries as thoughts, words that your mind puts together. Just observe them as if you where someone else and do not judge them, just look at them. Imagine them written in the air, the wall, floor, etc. This way you can acknowledge your worries are there without becoming overwhelmed by them, as you are just looking at them.

• Be present- worrying about the future constantly or about the “what ifs” will always have you worrying. Try to catch and stop yourself from this. There is nothing wrong with planning and being nervous about important upcoming events or situations, but when your mind is constantly thinking about what will happen next or about “what if this or that”, you will always be worrying about the future and the multiple possibilities. That will stop you from enjoying your present. Your present is the only moment you really have and is important to try to focus on it. If you are with family, friends, by yourself or engaged in a task or activity, put all your attention in this. Focus on what you are doing and do it with intention. Focus on your senses and what is happening right there and then.

This might take some practice and is completely normal to have those worries coming back even when you are trying to focus on the present. When this happens, gently take your mind back to your present moment.

• Practice breathing and relaxation exercises- these can help calm your mind and your body, especially from the tension that worries can create in us. Try deep breathing exercises several times a day to oxygenate your brain and body. This will only take you a minute or two and can help you keep going with your stressful day.

Guided relaxation exercises can also be very helpful. Sometimes is hard to take the time and practice an exercise if you have a busy schedule. In that case you might want to look at moments like a couple of minutes of your lunch time, right before bedtime, when taking a bath, etc.

Take action:

• Set a worry time- Set a time of your day to write down and think about your worries. This will give you a time to consider them and take other steps if needed. Also, it can give your brain some sort of peace, as you know you have separated a time to deal with your worries. Do this around the same time every day, for only several minutes (for example 6:00-6:20pm), and make sure you do this a couple of hours before bedtime to prevent being too anxious at the time you go to bed.  

• Identify what you can control- we often worry about things that are absolutely out of our control or are not solvable. By identifying if you can control or can solve these worries, you can actually evaluate them and move on to act on them. Ask yourself if the worry you are evaluating is something you can control and if there is something you can do about it. If the answer is yes to these two questions, then continue to create a plan.

• Create a plan, focus on problem solving- from that list of worries that you can control and do something about it, pick one at a time, and create a plan. Some of these worries might resolve quickly. Others might take you longer. For those that will take you a longer time, create small steps that you can work on until you achieve your final step to resolve the situation and therefore, your worry.

These steps can help prevent suppression of worries, and help you feel that you are actually taking steps to manage your worries, instead of just having them ruminating around in your head.

At Bedtime

It is very common for people to worry at this time. After all, our minds are not really busy at this moment and therefore, our never stop thinking brains will bring all of those things we worry about at this moment. Leave a paper and pen by your side and write down some of these worries, make a to do list so you don’t worry about forgetting things that need to be dealt with. Do this for just several minutes and practice a mindfulness or relaxation exercise to help you fall asleep. I particularly like to focus on my senses while breathing slowly and put on some background relaxing music.

As mentioned above, difficulty to manage your worries can lead to anxiety disorders. If you find it hard to control your worries, despite your efforts to manage them, you may want to consult with a mental health professional. Anxiety can be quite detrimental to an individual’s life, but therapy is often a beneficial treatment.

Until next time….

Dr. Melendez